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candy bars

stand up - Hedberg
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I got two straws here in case one breaks down. You know, crazy straws. They go all over the place. These ******* straws are sane. They never lost their mind. Said we're going straight to the mouth. Takes a while to get there. He's crazy. Vending machines are a big part of my life. I like when you reach into the vending machine to grab your candy bar. That flap goes up to block you from reaching up. That's a good invention. Before that, it was hard times for the vending machine owners. What, Kenny, are you getting that one and everyone on the bottom row? I wanna make a vending machine that sells vending machines that be real ******* big. I was gonna get candy by the button, not supposed to push with H so I went to the side. I found the H button. I pushed it twice. ******* potato chips came out man, because they had H button. For Christ sakes, you need to let me know. I'm not familiar with the concept of age. I did not learn my Abcs God, *** **** it. Damn it. I get to read this candy. If you read that name r...
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